


50 Ways To Leave Your Lover

by TheRoommateFromHell



Category: Batman: The Animated Series
Genre: F/F, Lyric fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-12
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-18 04:25:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10609227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRoommateFromHell/pseuds/TheRoommateFromHell
Summary: She said "It grieves me so to see you in such painI wish there was something I could do to make you smile again"





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this at LEAST a year ago im sorry for everything wrong with it.

_ "The problem is all inside your head" she said to me _

_ "The answer is easy if you take it logically _

_ I'd like to help you in your struggle to be free _

_ There must be fifty ways to leave your lover" _

 

The night they met Harley ended up explaining her whole situation with the Joker to Ivy, she hadn’t meant to but they’d had a few celebratory drinks and pretty soon she was sobbing all over her new friend about how he wasn’t really a cruel man, not really, you just had to have a sense of humour, you had to get the joke. Ivy’s face had contorted in anger but she just sat and held the blonde while she cried, softly soothing her. 

 

After a short while Harley hiccuped a final sob and wiped her eyes, sitting up to look in Poison Ivy’s eyes.

 

“Sometimes I don’t wanna get the joke anymore, Red, sometimes I just want him ta love me like a normal person instead of a clown.” Tears silently began falling again. “He doesn’t really love me does he?”

 

“He loves the destruction of you.” Ivy shifted away from Harleen and stood. “He thinks of you as his personal, well, joke. It’s funny to him how he can utterly and entirely rip you apart and you’ll still devote yourself to him. He’s the kind of man who would take a puppy and put it into a dogfight against three older dogs, just for kicks. I’ve been in this business longer than you Harl, seen him in action longer, he’s not a good person, and he’s trying to make you a bad person too, just to show he can.”

 

Pamela didn’t look back at Harley as she spoke, instead she stared out the window into her wasteland. Harley thought about plugging her ears instead of listening but she knew Ivy was speaking from an outsider's perspective, giving her what she asked for, speaking the truth.

 

“There must be 50 ways to leave your lover.” The redhead said so quietly Harley missed what was said.

 

_ She said "It's really not my habit to intrude _

_ Furthermore, I hope my meaning won't be lost or misconstrued _

_ But I'll repeat myself at the risk of being crude _

_ There must be fifty ways to leave your lover _

_ Fifty ways to leave your lover" _

 

“What was that?” Harley asked, standing up. Ivy turned around.

 

“Sorry, I don’t put myself in people’s personal lives usually, but I said there must be fifty ways to leave your lover. I'd like to help you to be free, if that's what you really want.”

 

_ You just slip out the back, Jack _

 

“You could run away, never go back.”

_   
_ _ Make a new plan, Stan _

 

“Make a name for yourself in this world that doesn’t have anything to do with him.”

 

_ You don't need to be coy, Roy _

 

“You could boast of your treasures and never feel guilty. You wouldn’t be punished if everything didn't go exactly to plan.”

_   
_ _ Hop on the bus, Gus _

 

“You could skip town and never look back.”

_   
_ _ You don't need to discuss much _

 

“No words, just disappear.”

 

_ Just drop off the key, Lee _

 

“Throw the keys he gave you in the river.”

_   
_ _ And get yourself free _

 

“Set yourself free.”

 

“Do you think it's really that easy?” Harley asked

 

“No, of course not, it’s always easier said than done, but with a little push, you could do it. If it would make you happy, you wouldn’t have to do it alone, I’d go with you, I’d help you.”

 

“Would you really?”

 

“Of course, Harl. For now lets just sleep on it, alright?” Ivy kissed the edge of Harleys lips on her way to her cheek and Harley smiled.

 

There were fifty ways to leave your lover after all, and Harley knew Ivy wouldn’t use them on her.

  
  


_ She said "It grieves me so to see you in such pain _ __   
_ I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again" _ __   
_ I said "I appreciate that and would you please explain _ __   
_ About the fifty ways" _ __   
_ She said "Why don't we both just sleep on it tonight _ __   
_ And I believe in the morning you'll begin to see the light" _ __   
_ And then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right _ _   
_ __ There must be fifty ways to leave your lover

  
_   
_ _ Fifty ways to leave your lover _

**Author's Note:**

> Save a writer, leave a comment


End file.
